Six-year-old pilots plane
Recently, I started eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) in therapy. Sometimes people use tapping instead of rapid eye movement. Basically, it’s a process that is used to help you reprocess the feelings and energy around certain events that happened to you and help remove the limiting attachment to that feeling. Full disclosure, I was pretty skeptical about it. But I am committed to working on overcoming my fear and anxiety, so that means I have to do the work. World-renowned author Jack Canfield talks about using it. He calls it the “emotional freedom technique” and uses tapping.
In the work I’ve been doing it’s become clear that I was alone and afraid and didn’t feel safe a lot as a child. Are you nodding? I hope not. But I’ve talked to a lot of people who’ve had similar childhoods. For me, those experiences & feelings translated into not feeling loved or lovable. Not feeling worthy or important. I grew up not trusting those around me. I grew up knowing I couldn’t count on my caregiver to take care of me so how could I possibly learn to trust anyone else? Canfield also shared another way to look at this. I’ll paraphrase, what would you do if you got on an airplane and the pilot standing there to greet you was a 6-year-old? That would be alarming right? That is what our lives are like. We are being piloted by our little selves because we haven’t dealt with those feelings.
Now it’s not all bad, some of those experiences also translated into me being fiercely independent and resourceful. On the other hand, those same character traits also work against me because I don’t let people help me, and I have trouble asking for help. I’ve also played it safe A LOT. I’ve played small, held back when I should have pushed forward. Leaned in. I can’t play small anymore, I can’t hide my light. I don’t want you to play small or hide anymore either. This work can be so hard, but so worth it! I’m glad you are here. Tell me what you think is holding you back. What’s one thing you could do today to push forward and take that baby step? If you message me and tell me your one thing, I’ll send you a free coffee. (Value $5)
